Getting naked with a group of strangers? Sign me up

I’m not a streaker, I’m not a nudist and the idea of taking a holiday in those resorts and cruise ships where the people you’d least like to see naked are exactly that, fills me with terror. But unlike my ESCAPE colleague Simone Mitchell who is less than thrilled with the growing popularity of public hot bathing, I’ll admit I’m a sucker for putting my hand up for any situation where bathing with perfect strangers is on the itinerary.

I could point the finger at my Turkish heritage, I suppose (blaming my background has been a lifelong habit for me). I’ve grown up in a culture where it’s perfectly natural for women to come together at the local hamam to bathe, soak and gossip, and while I’m not into the gossip side of things, I’m a huge fan of the type of conversations you can really only have with someone when you’re being scrubbed – or waterboarded – while you’re lying side-by-side on a hot marble slab.

See also: I’ve plunged into freezing cold water in 5 countries. Here’s what I learned

Over the years much has been made about how the car is the best place to initiate, and engage in, a difficult conversation. Experts say this is because it’s easier for us to open up and speak honestly when we’re not looking at each other, but seated next to one another and facing the same direction. They also add that the constant distractions outside the moving car keep things from becoming too heated inside the bubble. I agree that cars are excellent for those kinds of chats, but so too are hot bodies of water where you tend to look off into the distance rather than the people you’re with (because that would be weird). They also tend to be a far more scenic option.

I realised how valuable getting naked (or near-naked) in hot springs, communal baths and hamams were some time ago when I was on a group tour with a few women who were quite reserved and conversation didn’t stretch much beyond, ‘It’s chilly out, isn’t it?’. It took some coaxing to get them to disrobe and enter the large, steamy bath, but once they did, something changed.

With nowhere to hide and nothing to hide behind, conversations suddenly went deep, ranging from childhood traumas and broken marriages to issues with adult children. Once you get nude with someone in a communal setting, it’s difficult to get back to talking about your petunias and I was thrilled to find that our group dynamic changed overnight, bringing us all in just that little bit tighter. 

Now, whether I’m with friends, family or perfect strangers on a group tour, I make a point of zeroing in on whatever bathing experience I can find in town. Szechenyi Baths in Budapest? An onsen in Tokyo, a hamam in Istanbul or even a women’s Korean bathhouse experience in Sydney? 

In an effort to avoid all small talk (I hate small talk more than Simone Mitchell hates public soaks in hot water),  I’ll say yes to all of it because if it’s one thing I’ve learned, you’ll probably discover your next lifelong friend at a time when you’re in an uncomfortable situation together – not when everyone’s in the safety of their own private bathing spaces.